100 things we hate about football

We wouldn’t be here was it not for the beautiful game. But it’s not always beautiful. Here are 100 things in football that really gets under our skin.

Tell us what grinds your gears in the comments section.

1. Corners that don’t beat the first man
2. Fans that leave before the end of the game
3. When music is played after a goal
4. Diving
5. Feigning and exaggerating injury
6. Kit changes every year
7. The term ‘footy’ or ‘footie’
8. Foul throws not being called up on
9. International breaks
10. Yellow cards for over-zealous celebrations
11. Footballers’ wages
12. When the referee measures back the wall but they encroach when his back is turned
13. Half-and-half scarves
14. Fans who blindly defend everything about their club
15. Short corners
16. Adrian Chiles
17. Over complicated free-kicks that hit the wall
18. Groans when the ball is forced back to the goalkeeper
19. Refusal to accept multi-coloured boots
20. Being reminded that Gary Neville is a good pundit the moment he says something reasonable
21. When players surround the referee pleading for a decision
22. Match Of The Day’s bland and boring analysis
23. Players not celebrating against a club they played for five years ago
24. Long, drawn-out transfer sagas
25. “2-0 is a dangerous lead”
26. British analysts’ ignorance towards foreign leagues
27. Free-kicks that are played backwards
28. Naming rights for stadiums
29. The Soccer AM generation and its horrible ‘banter’
30. Time-wasting goalkeepers
31. Made-up transfer rumours from tabloids and websites
32. Jon Champion’s commentary
33. Gloves with short sleeves
34. Billionaire clubs that buy success
35. World Cup 2022 being in Qatar
36. Sepp Blatter
37. Jamie Redknapp
38. Being reminded from someone other than Jamie Redknapp about his incorrect use of the word ‘literally’
39. The idea that all Americans are clueless towards soccer
40. Goalkeepers that wear tracksuit bottoms
41. Paul Merson’s inability to correctly pronounce player names
42. Transfer fee analysis from fans
43. Craig Burley
44. Someone who accuses another of ‘not being a real fan’
45. Over-analysing a game at the expense of enjoying it
46. Journalists that think they’re more important than they really are
47. Ripping into Stoke because they don’t play like Barcelona
48. The Barcelona and Real Madrid circle-jerk
49. Describing a position using words that end in “ista”, i.e. “Regista”, “Triquertista”
50. The sponsor on the Ireland shirt
51. David ”Good evening ladies and gentleman” Pleat
52. Gareth Bale’s heart celebration
53. “But can he do it on a cold…” Stop. Just stop.
54. People who claim to know all about obscure players when in reality they signed them once in Football Manager
55. John Terry being photoshopped into every single celebration, football or otherwise
56. “You’re from Ireland so you support Celtic right?”
57. iPads in the crowd
58. “He’s not that type of player”
59. The FA Cup Final kicking off at 5.15pm
60. FIFA rankings
61. Adidas Predators – bring back the tongue!
62. The over protection of goalkeepers
63. Club Wembley, no one likes seeing empty seats at a big game
64. The ambiguity of the offside rule
65. The bastardisation of the term “World Class”
66. Shushing opposition fans after scoring
67. The FAI
68. Badge kissing
69. Fans booing their own team/players/manager
70. Wanting a rival team’s player to score for fantasy football purposes
71. Fans who spend more time talking about rival clubs
72. Full kit wankers
73. Paddy Crerand
74. The obsession with statistics
75. Sloop John B
76. Journalists using a tweet as the sole source for a story
77. Inverted wingers
78. The majority of fan generated player nicknames / fans who refer to players on a first-name basis
79. Waving imaginary cards
80. Undisclosed transfer fees
81. Hillsborough/Munich/other disaster chants
82. Racism
83. Players storming down the tunnel after being substituted
84. Your own country failing to qualify for a major tournament
85. “He was going for the ball”
86. Ray Wilkins
87. Fouls not given in the box that would be given outside the box
88. Sarcastic use of the term “good feet for a big man”
89. Eamon Dunphy telling us about the one La Liga/Bundesliga game he’s seen during every Champions League match
90. The media frenzy and expectation around the England national team
91. Being told that the latest football is “lighter and rounder than ever”
92. Garth Crooks’ Team of the Week
93. Geoff Shreeves-style interviews
94. The push to outlaw tackling once and for all
95. Owners who mismanage clubs to the point of receivership or worse
96. People forming opinions of players based on two minute YouTube videos
97. Fans who get their own names/”witty slogans” on the back of jerseys
98. Mark Lawrenson’s predictions
99. Referees not applying the six second rule, it still exists
100. Twitter, yet we just can’t turn it off

Did we miss anything? Let us know in the comments section below or on Twitter collectively and individually – @neighmar11 / @neilsherwin!